Life Of A Manthra

The life of a Manthra. There will be stealing. There will be more stealing. You will have something stolen. And some dude who has a catgirl fetish will be sad.

Monday, October 23, 2006

Thank You

Just one last thank you to the readers. Take care guys. =^.^=

Thursday, October 12, 2006

The Last Day In The Life Of A Manthra

This is hard for me, because for the very few posts I've made, I enjoyed writing them. Obviously, not all the blogs were completely true, I had to add/change alot of things to make it enjoyable for you, the reader. But, I enjoyed this because I am a writer, though I never really applied myself to these blogs' style.

Had I not had my residence issues at the beginning of the year, I'd like to think the small fanbase I had would have grown. Even after coming back, I didn't post more than 3 blogs I believe. Mostly because I stopped doing the small scams I had been doing and lacked the time to do consecutive updates.

I apologize for this because a there have been one or two of you that are still keeping up with the updates. I apologize again for quitting this blog.

[GM]Dave and Goblin Smithy blogs are more funny and more enjoyable. I merely tried to jump on the FFXI blog bandwagon and ride on Dave's coattails.

Have fun adventuring! Manthra are really out there, and they act in much the same way as I have posted the blogs. Don't be scammed by them.

=^.^=

Only me.

After all, I'm still a cute and furry kitty. =^.^=

Sunday, September 24, 2006

ATTN: Elvaan Males

Please stop making my job so freaking easy.

So I'm bazaaring some items that I obtained without any major expenditures (read: scammed) in Windurst near the Auction House. Let me start by saying my bazaar comment is sexy.

(Bazaar) (please) (check) (Help me out!) (No money!) =^-^=

Priceless, yes?

So, I go afk to eat dinner and have a smoke. I come back hoping to have made some slightly legit money.

Well, it's me =^-^=;; and things just don't fly like that for me.

Syran>> you there?
Syran>> (Hello!)?
Syran>> you don't have anything i need but i want to help you

First of all, dumbass, if I'm selling items that cost between 20 and 100k in my bazaar, do you really think I need money?

The answer is yes, yes I need money. Give it to me.

Now.

I run to my Mog House to get some gear to send to my main, but out of habit, I check my delivery box to see if some of my Auctions have paid off.

No, fission mailed there.

But..what's this?

100k?

From?

Syran!?

Seriously, you made my job too easy this time. I didn't even have to say anything to you and I got gil.

Holiana>> (Um...) (Thank you.) for sending me that gil.
Holiana>> But do I even know you? =^-^=
Syran>> np GL hit me up sometime babe

/sea all Syran

WAR53/NIN26

Elvaan.

Male.

Figures.

Seriously, if I have learned anything in my time as a manthra (other than that nearly any guy will give what could possibly be a living, breathing female --not just a blow up doll!-- Gil) it's that Elvaan males are the biggest perverts in all of Vana'Diel.

At least on Phoenix.

But, I think it would be kind of weird for Taru Taru to be the biggest pervs on another server. I mean seriously.

Pervytaruwaru>> Hey babe.
OffendedChick(who possibly has a penis)>> Did that bush just /tell me?
Pervytaruwaru>> Do you still have a bush or is the playing field ready?
/blist Pervytaruwaru

Talk about creepy.

Friday, September 08, 2006

GTFO Of My Party, Gimp!

We've all been in a party with a gimp.

It's different being in a party with a retarded gimp.

Even more so when you have ebreasts...very, very different when you have ebreasts.

I'm proud of most players, you're still stupid at lv20+, but the majority of you lose your retarded tendencies at lv20.

And I use the term "most" loosely, very, very loosely.

But, I digress, the rest of you, do not. You're still retarded, otherwise I wouldn't be able to scam you.

Recently, I just scammed myself around 25, newb free levels of glorious PLing. This guy was at my beck and call, whenever I wanted him, he was there. Met him in Qufim in party, mention he had lv75 WHM. (Yes, please.)

So, straight outta Qufim, all the way up to the end of Garlaige Citadel. He put leveling his BRD on hold to PL me. (Like it matters, he'll be lv75 in another day as BRD.)

Sadly, after I dinged lv40, one of us stopped talking to the other one.

Read: I blacklisted him. =^_^=

It's not like he was giving me Gil or items, and I could care less about the levels on my mule. (Read: scamming kitty.)

But, I met a new boytoy on the way to Crawler's Nest.

With one problem...

He was a fucking moron.

WAR41/THF18.

Okay, you have an underleveled sub, but I'm still flirting with you so I can get Gil.

Then, when the party gathered at the camp, we all looked at his gear.

Seriously outdated, upgrade NAO!

But, we had all been LFG in the middle of the night, we had to take what we could get.

What we got was deathga. The first (and only fight) went something like this.

WAR>> Hey ugly, come here! (Provoke)!
WAR>> Hey ugly, come here! (Provoke)!
WAR>> Hey ugly, come here! (Provoke)!
WAR>> Hey ugly, come here! (Provoke)!
COR>> Move closer to the mob.
WAR>> Hey ugly, come here! (Provoke)!
WAR>> Hey ugly, come here! (Provoke)!
Holiana>> Very cute macro. =WAR>> ty
WAR>> Hey ugly, come here! (Provoke)!
The WARRIOR takes 91 damage.
WAR>> Help!
WHM>> You're the tank!
WAR>> How about Tetsu tanks?
THF>> I'm a THF.
WAR>> It's my party, I say you tank.
The WARRIOR takes 87 damage.
Holiana>> Fuck this, I'm not dealing with this guy.
Holiana starts casting Warp.
Critical hit! Holiana takes 175 damage.
Holiana>> Voke off me!
WARRIOR is defeated.
WARRIOR falls to level 40.
THF is defeated.
Holiana is defeated.
Holiana falls to level 39.
SAMURAI is defeated.
WHITE MAGE is defeated.

Okay, yeah, our party sucked. But, our "leader" was just a dick about it.

WAR>> WTF guys, I deleveled cause you assholes.

Pardon?

WAR>> You guys are assholes!

There you go, I missed it the first time you said it.

WAR>> Especially you Holiana!

WTF? VENGENCE IS MINE.

Holiana>> I'm not dealing with your immaturity and I'm not dealing with a party leader who is a dick to everyone, I'm leaving.
WAR>> You can't just leave.
MNK>> Yeah, screw this, I'm out too.
Holiana>> I wouldn't stay if you paid me.
WAR>> 100k.
WAR>> To each of you.
Holiana>> Okay, but only if you tank and voke too.

So he agreed.

Don't look at me like that. I didn't do that for the party, I needed to take my vengence!

And my Gil! =^_^=

So we took our Gil from the Gil buyer and after weakness wore, we sent him on a long pull.

A very long pull.

And we switched over to /say.

Holiana: How many of you guys have Instant Warp scrolls? WHM I know you have Warp.

Oh my God, we actually kick ass, the other 3 (aside from WHM and myself) have Warp scrolls.

WAR>> Hey ugly, come here! (Provoke)!
WAR>> Hey ugly, come here! (Provoke)!

Holiana: You guys know what I'm thinking, right?

WAR>> Hey ugly, come here! (Provoke)!
WAR>> Hey ugly, come here! (Provoke)!

/Nods all around.

WAR>> Hey ugly, come here! (Provoke)!
WAR>> Hey ugly, come here! (Provoke)!

Holiana: On the count of !


WAR>> Hey ugly, come here! (Provoke)!

And so he ran towards his freedom, his safety. The loving, open arms of his party.

Sadly, we weren't that party.

Holiana>> WAR you rock! We think you're an awesome player!
WAR>> Really?
Holiana>> Fuck no!
Holiana casts Warp.
THF uses a Scroll of Instant Warp.
WHM casts Warp.
MNK uses a Scroll of Instant Warp.
SAM uses a Scroll of Instant Warp.
Holiana waves goodbye to WARRIOR.
Holiana>> GTFO of my party, gimp!

And again, I saw a site I never thought I'd gave the pleasure of seeing ever again.

Someone's face being removed from their body as I warped to safety.

Freaking beautiful.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Worse Than A [GM]

Everyone who has played FFXI has to have had at least one [GM] encounter. At least one. Maybe you made the call (you asshole narc) or you were on the receiving end (you asshole botter).

The point is, SE is really pissing me off lately. I understand that, yes, on occaison, I will have to deal with one of your [GM]s. I accept this.

The thing I hate is whenever you make a [GM] call you always see the following message.

A [GM] will contact you shortly. There are 1,203,813 calls to process before yours.

Screw that, am I right?

But, it's not really holding you up, you just have to wait 3 hours. Go exp, you're set.

But, I'm struggling to reactivate my account now after the billing mishap. So, I'm trying to talk to SE's customer service.

Yes, customer service.

Screw that. It's like being on hold with tech support, minus the muzak.

...plus a pop up window every minute saying

All agents are currently busy. Please stand by.

An agent will be with you in a moment. Thank you for your patience.

The next available Agent will be with you in a moment.

Bullshit! Where are you, you lying bastard? I sincerely doubt that there are more than 20 people using this fuction right now.

Cigarette break? Be honest, I understand.

Fucking the hot secretary in the copy room? Be honest, I understand...infact, I cheer you on.

Sitting at your computer, waiting, knowing that I'm busy and need your help. Knowing that yes, infact, time is of the essense at the moment.

You're laughing, you bastard. You don't care about the game. I'd just call and get help over the phone but you're probably Pakistani, quite unsure of how to even USE the fucking computer in front of you.

And you probably use Babelfish to translate our conversations and that is why I can't even understand what you're saying on fucking CUSTOMER SERVICE CHAT!

Wait one moment while you are being connected. You will be notified once you are connected with a representative.
All agents are currently busy. Please stand by.

An agent will be with you in a moment. Thank you for your patience.

The next available Agent will be with you in a moment.

All agents are currently busy. Please stand by.

An agent will be with you in a moment. Thank you for your patience.

The next available Agent will be with you in a moment.

All agents are currently busy. Please stand by.

An agent will be with you in a moment. Thank you for your patience.

The next available Agent will be with you in a moment.

All agents are currently busy. Please stand by.

An agent will be with you in a moment. Thank you for your patience.

The next available Agent will be with you in a moment.

All agents are currently busy. Please stand by.

An agent will be with you in a moment. Thank you for your patience.

The next available Agent will be with you in a moment.

All agents are currently busy. Please stand by.


No, no, no!

At least with a [GM] I have someone to lie to.


=T_T=

I am such a sad kitty.

Sunday, September 03, 2006

Dear SE,

Firstly, thank you for giving us this game. It is so much fun to scam epervs.

Secondly, fuck you.

I said it, you said it, we've all said it.

Not at one point that I can remember has anyone sat back and said, "God damn, I don't think SE could ever suck."

Well, I've said that I suppose...but it's usually followed by "anymore than they already are."

Apparently, when I came back to the game in August, I entered my billing information incorrectly, so when they tried to bill me this month, they deactivated my account.

I was okay with this, this part was my fault. I'm sorry that my Visa giftcard had improper balance, I thought I had more in the account.

So I have one of my roommates use their credit card for me and reactivate my account.

Me>>Thanks roommate, you're awesome.
Roommate>>I know!

So my roommate leaves for her boyfriend's house and I click next. My account is successfully reactivated.

But, wait!

What is this?

Enter valid billing information?

But, I just did! And SE, you even said that I did!

Apparently, when you miss a payment, they deactivate the account until the balanace is paid. THEN they make you enter in new valid billing information.

Why this requires two steps I don't know.

IthinkhowSEthinkspeoplethink>>Gee, I'll use my Mastercard to pay for the overdue payment and then I'll use my Visa card for new billing information!

Or, not.

Fuck you, SE, fuck you.

Love and kitty kisses,
Holiana =^_^=

Monday, August 28, 2006

While Not Really A Scam...

...this next adventure of mine was mildly entertaining.

I was running around Windurst, doing my thing. (Read: man scamming.) Everything seemed to be going great, it was just plain great being back in FFXI.

I ran downstairs to get something to drink and when I came back, I was appalled.

Blikzy>>hay you look liek som1 i wanna get 2 no

Just a few things before I go any further.

1. Just because I run around as naked as I can make my character be, doesn't mean you can hit on me.

2. If you hit on me, I will scam you.

3. It's a fucking mass of pixels, you asshat.

4. Stop living. Now.

But, assuming that I could scam something from Blikzy, I entered into the conversation.

Holiana>>Oh really? =^_^=
Blikzy>>ya ur hot

Sex life. (Do you have it?)

At this point I had /checked him and my heart sank. MNK18, no sub.

So he follows me around like a lost puppy, all the to Valkurm. At this point, I'm pissed off.

I am offended.

This prick does not know how to talk to women.

Side note: Maybe I'm taking this role to seriously.

All I wanted to do was level my BLM and this asshole ends up in my party. And I can't even fucking concentrate cause this guy is trying to get into my epanties the whole damned time!

That subless prick.

That's when I get the idea. It's vicious. It's cruel. It's painful.

It's so something that I had to do.

Holiana>>Hey, do you have the items for your subjob quest?
Blikzy>>i need teh skull

Almost one whole sentence without an error, impressive.

Holiana>>Let's leave the pt and head over to Gusgen. The Ghouls are easier to kill there.
Blikzy>>u jus wanna b alon w/ me

Yeah buddy, you got it.

Holiana>>Heehee. Maaaybeee. =^_^=

So we run to Gusgen and I run to where the Ghouls are with him nipping at my heels. Just seconds after we get there, I find one and tell him to pull it. So he grabs it and my heart skips a beat as he takes his first stabbings.

Oh, how beautiful it was.

Blikzy>>help use magic
Holiana>>You sure?

I mean, I just want him to be absolutely sure that he wants me to use magic.

Blikzy>>ya im sure!!!!!1

Okay, ask and you shall receive. At this point the Ghoul is still at like 72% HP.

On the other hand, Blikzy is only at about 19%.

Holiana>>Okay, here I go!

Holiana starts casting Warp on Holiana.

Just as the cast bar was nearing 100%, Blikzy's HP fell to 2%.

Blikzy>>wat r u doin!?!?1
Holiana>>Using magic. =^_^=

Holiana casts Warp.

And just as I Warped out, I got the extreme pleasure of seeing him getting slashed in the face one last time.

Blikzy was defeated by the Ghoul.
Blikzy falls to level 17.

Aw! It looks like you won't need that Magicked Skull yet anyways!

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Back In The Life Of A Manthra

Guess what folks? Your friendly neighborhood Manthra is back!

Replace "Your friendly" with "The person who" and "neighborhood Manthra" with "scams your Gil."

Nothing to update with today folks other than Holiana now has a Myspace Page! So go on over and add her if you have a Myspace. (Which self hating eperv doesn't?)

For now, I gotta go scam myself some gear.

Afterall, I am a cute and furry kitty =^.^=

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Holiana Lives!

Dear future scammers, future scammees and past, present and future readers,

I'll spare the long story because I know that not one of you care to hear it. You want to hear more exploits of my scammings and stories of desperate epervs.

Since the beginning of May, I have moved 4 times. Finally, I am in a secure house and I won't be moving again for another year. (Praise be to Manthra.)

Sadly, due to the inability to access, let alone pay for my FFXI service, my characters were deleted and I must start over.

Luckily, I'm just going to scam my way back through. Give me few more weeks folks, you'll have your scam stories and desperate epervs.

(Take care!) =^_^=

Holiana

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Lessons Of A Manthra: Playing It Cute

To begin with, I'd like to give thanks for the few donations I've received. I steal your Gil and items and mock you in a blog for it, and still, you give me real money in return. Seriously, how dumb could you possibly be? But, still, thanks all the same.

I've been asked a few times by forum posters, Linkshell members and close ingame friends that actually know of my schemes and even some of the readers have asked the question.

How do you actually do successfully?

Well, my victims--I mean, friends. Today I will start to share the Manthra knowledge with you. I have given small pieces of advice throughout the exploits I've already shared with you, but, now's a chance for some direct lessons.

1. BE CUTE! =^.^=
Remember, you are trying to be a girl. You can't run around like, "Yo dude, what's up?" Play it nice. Play it cute. If you ever need to get away from someone, say your brother needs to get online, mention that he's a jerk, but be cute about it, you'll probably get some general pity, which is always a good thing. Always be knew to the game. You are a sexy cat girl, lost and alone in the big scary world of Vana'Diel and you need a strong e-man's help to get you through it...

...

or, at least, his wallet.

Maybe that Scorpion Harness he's wearing.

Probably both.
Rarely will (or should) directly ask for something. It has been my experience that directly asking for something will either blow your cover or make your intentions known. Just be cute and innocent (like any cute and furry kitty is =^.^=) and what you want will come your way. I'm not saying the guy you're man scamming is actually going to trade you his Scorpion Harness, rather, I'm saying you won't walk away empty handed.

Or, in our cases, pawed. =^.^=

The younger you are, the cuter you are. If you have a chance to mention your age, go for it. Lowball it, but don't be like, "hay i'm 13".

Remember, the world of Vana'Diel is online. The majority of the online populace are perverts. Feed the perverted minds. You are 16, (I usually say that I am 18, that way I am legal and they can get ideas that aren't illegal in their heads. But, use whichever age you find best.) you are a kitty, you are wonderful, you are funny, you are talking to, you are worth giving items and Gil to and you are just too damned cute. =^.^=
If you decide to keep a man you've scammed around so you can continue to scam him, (a dangerous process called leeching, which we will cover in another post), it is best that you Google a picture of an innocent looking girl. Create a screenname, possibly an email address.
Basically, you are inventing an alterego for yourself. Almost anything you would use online, create one for your Manthra alterego.
Most importantly, give yourself a unique name, ingame and off. That's not to say the name I use for Holiana's IRL alterego is Holiana, but rather, Holly Anna. It's cute, and it's unique. The picture I use for Holiana is cute and beautiful in an innocent kind of way. You don't want a picture of some punk rock princess or some crazy scenester. You have to take second to realize, your personality, ingame and off and a picture if you use one is all your targets have to form an idea about you.
If you run up to someone, acting everything but interested in them, and look like a scumbag in your picture, what do you think they think of you. Now, do you think you're going to walk away with anything? More than likely, no you won't.
Best way to find a picture like mine is just go through pictures on Myspace. There are alot of 16-18 year old girls who think they're artistic and take cute and/or innocent pictures of themselves. It's how I got mine. ^_~
For now, that's all the information I'll give you. I have Gil to go scam.
-Holiana-